Lifestyle

Where Are We Now?

Where are we now as a family? That’s an interesting question to ponder.

As a family, I now have Kevin and Johnathan. They are my family and I love them to pieces. Has it always been easy?

Dear God, no.

But I’m here to tell you that you CAN make it through things together as a family. We are here and happy being together, which for us is the most important thing. I love my husband and son. You may think we are only a small unit and yes, you’re right about that. But that’s not important. The actual number of people in a family unit is unimportant as long as you know that each one supports the others.

Up Next for Johnathan

Johnathan will be starting school properly come August time. I’m really looking forward to it as an opportunity to get to know other Mums and begin to form a friendship with them. It’s been really difficult to do so at the nursery because I have had to be careful going in and out with the wheelchair as there isn’t really enough space for wheelchairs. And my health hasn’t been good enough to be out every day, but it is picking up again now, thank goodness!

The blessing for us is that Johnathan has been attending nursery next door so picking him up has been REALLY easy. He’s going to be about half a mile down the road at his new school. They understand he has complex needs with his autism but they are prepared to facilitate his learning anyway.

I am so glad that the nursery head suggested the school Johnathan will be attending. She knew the type of support we needed as a family and I know that Johnathan will be challenged in the new school to learn, develop and grow. He likes to hide what he can do, but now that I have told them he does, I know they will be observant and see exactly what he can and cannot do.

What’s Kevin Doing?

Kevin is carrying on working for the computing company he has worked for now for 10 years. He enjoys it there and is in the office two days a week and working from home 3 days a week. This really helps me as it means I don’t have to drive him in every day. And also, if I cannot take him, it doesn’t cost too much in taxis, although we would like to stop this expense.

Kevin is just the way he always is – brilliant at computers and really supportive in helping me look after our son. He truly is my soulmate and I am so glad I met him and we have this wonderful life together. I often think that I have no idea what I would do without him. My life certainly wouldn’t be in the good place I am in now. He helped me through multiple flashbacks and nightmares when we first got together. Sometimes you just need that reassurance from someone that loves and understands you that everything is ok and will be ok.

As For Me

I will be continuing to write and just go on doing it. Writing really is my life and I can’t imagine ever not writing. There are so many days it has helped cheer me up and given me something positive to focus on. So many days of my life I have written, especially when I have been struggling over things and it has helped me handle them better.

Focusing on the Positive

Yes, we could focus on the negative of our lives. But, do you know what? We can also focus on the positive. There are so many positives compared to the negatives. And I want to focus on them. My life was changed dramatically when I moved to Scotland. Not only was it a different country but the pace of life was slow, especially compared to the frenetic lifestyle I had lived in England. I have discovered what I really want to do. Although it took me a number of years to realise, Kevin knew from early on in our relationship. Why I didn’t realise it before, I have no idea, but now that I know it is definitely going to be a focused part of my life and not just something I do every day.

Do I have any bright spots in my life? Of course I do! My husband and son are the main ones. I can’t think of them without my face breaking into a smile. Their health and wellbeing, as well as my own, is vital. Our family is the most important thing in my life and we all support each other as much as we can.

For me, some kind of creativity or going for a drive in the beautiful countryside is what I need in my life to help my mental health. Both Kevin and Johnathan enjoy the drives as well, which is nice that we can share a family pleasure together. I very much doubt I will ever stop either enjoyment until I actually have to for whatever reason. They are as important to me as breathing is.

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