Growth or fixed mindset

I have been thinking about the differences between the two mindsets recently. I often find myself thinking in a fixed mindset way. For example, there are times that I believe things will never change.

This, of course, is a sign that I am thinking in a fixed mindset way and I need to expand it into a growth mindset. When I left England and moved to Scotland, I believed that things could not be worse and I would rather be lonely than continue to stay where I was.

However, God had other plans for me and I met my husband Kevin. My fixed mindset said we wouldn’t have children and here I am with 5 babies in heaven and one on earth. But it still doesn’t mean I have a growth mindset in every area of my life.

This last week has been a bit strange in some ways. I realised that I was not exactly who I believed myself to be and that my character and ability was not being expressed in the way I present my website and Facebook business page.

So things are going to be changed and updated. I will be keeping the name of the business the same but the way things look will be different. Expressing myself in my own unique way without muting my desire for colour and freedom will be taking me on a different path.

The other thing that has struck me is that I have not had a growth mindset in every area of my life and the biggest one is finances. Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that we assume money will magically grow on trees. You have to do something to bring the money in and work for it. God promises to bless the work of our hands, not that He is an instant money pot. I love knowing this. Such a wonderful truth to understand.

I don’t believe there is anyone who has a growth mindset in every area. We are all a work in progress and need to change things in ourselves and learn to trust our own abilities. In which areas of your life are you limiting yourself with a fixed mindset and which areas do you encourage growth in your life by having a mindset that is open to possibilities? I would love to hear from you.

Encouragement and limiting beliefs

There are times you need encouragement to help you stop living with limiting beliefs. Changing your mindset is not an easy thing to do so if you have someone supporting you to do it, that really helps.

To be honest with you, everyone benefits from help and support in whatever they do. I believe it is always good to try and encourage people if you can because you have no idea what they have been going through in a day.

One of my limiting beliefs that has caused quite a lot of self-sabotaging has been that I cannot complete something I start, especially if it is something artistic or craft oriented. The trouble is, I often start any projects I wish to complete with a negative mindset. This is something that causes me to sabotage projects subconsciously.

In the end, I start doing things and don’t complete them. This is not a good way to function in life. Perfectionist tendencies don’t help either. I want to complete things and do them without a mistake. However, this is not realistic.

Children watch everything you do and I don’t want my son not accepting completing something because it isn’t perfect. He needs to be shown that finishing tasks is important. I don’t want him to cultivate a limited mindset because I haven’t developed a growth mindset in myself.

Encouragement I would say is the backbone of being able to change your way of living and core beliefs inside yourself. If you cannot encourage yourself with your inner talk, then maybe you need someone on the outside to help you.

One of my friends said to me to look at it as though I am winning every time I complete a row of knitting or do something else that I would like to achieve. This has actually helped me to feel that I am doing something positive and creative at the same time. I can see the knitting grow as I work at it. No, it doesn’t look totally utterly perfect but it IS good enough.

Some things need practice and will develop slower in your life than others. And that’s ok. Not all your limiting beliefs will be transformed in an instant. But by working on them and either being your own cheerleader or having someone else to support you will really help things to be different in your life.

Limiting beliefs and mindset

People tend to have either a fixed or growth mindset and if it is a fixed one they often lead to holding limiting beliefs. Changing these are not easy because you may not even notice them and the fact that they stop you developing and growing.

When we want to improve our lives in any way, these beliefs can prevent this from happening. I personally didn’t realise they were there and was surprised to find so many of them. In fact, as time goes on, I am discovering more of them. Changing them is not as easy as just saying you want to. It requires a lot of hard work to do so. The reason is because these beliefs are deeply held and we often don’t recognise them either.

For example I thought I couldn’t do digital artwork. I found the whole thought of using a computer or ipad to create art contrary to what I believed. I had seen that artists could use ipads on the television but didn’t believe it was something I could do. Then one day Kevin showed me an app I found easy to use and enjoyed. Suddenly I realised I was actually doing digital art. Now I have the “evidence” to prove to myself that I can do it.

Sometimes the limiting belief is so deeply hidden inside yourself that it is hard to find. Working things out with other people can be helpful in doing so. Or maybe even journalling to understand yourself and be able to work things out.

Discovering what your beliefs are can be enlightening. You need to recognise what they are in order to be able to change them. And you have to understand that this is not a one-time experience but an ongoing challenge.

The fixed mindset holds you back but as you begin to tackle each limiting belief, you will find things changing for you. Every effort you make will now not be sabotaged as you make a different life for yourself and it will impact others around you too. They will see how things are improving and your attitude will be more positive as you develop and grow.

Looking at our limiting beliefs and beginning to change them will improve our lives. I am by no means an expert in doing this myself, but am on the journey to discovering them and how to develop a growth mindset instead.

You can make your passage through life better and easier by beginning to change as you see the contrast between the old and new you. The fixed mindset would have never believed you could do what you are doing now, but the growth mindset encourages you to keep growing and developing and understands that it is a constant progress through life and that your path is never static but always progressing.

So what are you going to do? Look at your life and discover change and growth? Or stay where you are and stagnate? You CAN develop a growth mindset and if you want to take this journey with me, I would be delighted to hear from you. Leave me a comment here or contact me via email at anika@anikasheartandcrafts.com.

How you view yourself in life

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How you view yourself is vitally important to the way you live your life. Sometimes it is important to stop and examine the thoughts you have about yourself and see if they are helping or hindering you.

This is not something I had really considered doing. When I moved to Scotland, I had a large number of limiting beliefs that held me back from developing, growing and changing in my life. The foremost and only thought of my mind I can remember at that time was that no matter what I did, nothing would work.

As I have started moving towards the future vision of what we want to do with our lives, I am beginning to discover certain thought patterns that have dictated I stay back in the box I put myself into in the first place.

Some people want to stay exactly as they are and not have to change, develop and grow. But life is not static. You are constantly finding things that change your perceived path in life. Babies grow up, your years on the earth change you and sometimes your road in life is a rocky one and seemingly unstable.

Yesterday one of my friends told me that I was believing and propagating a belief that would hold me back if I didn’t stop it. When I thought about it, I realised that she was correct and I needed to change the way I was thinking.

I have written about self-sabotaging behaviour in the past and sometimes the beliefs we hold cause us to self-sabotage. This is not the way I want to live and maybe you don’t either. So many times people tell me I can do or be something and I hold back. Not because they are necessarily wrong but I don’t believe what they are saying. And yet here I am having actually taken courses to begin to be able to volunteer to help others – something I NEVER thought I could do.

If you find that you are stuck in a particular place or way, then it is time you look at yourself closely and examine whether what you are doing confirms something negative or positive in your life. If your thoughts are hindering you moving into what you truly are, why not start to change them?

I want things to be positive in my life and to stop believing bad things about myself, and I am sure you do too. Limiting beliefs can hold you back in so many ways. How you see yourself brings out a certain pattern of behaviour that you may not even realise you are doing.

Just because you have lived a certain way all your life doesn’t mean you have to stay there. You can make a change, even if it is just a small one every day. Baby steps all the way. Being grateful for what we have is a good place to start. To that end, I have tried to post a grateful comment every day on my personal page.

As life changes and brings us challenges we never anticipated, we can meet them with either a positive or negative attitude. I’m not saying that everything can be met with a positive attitude in life straight away – that is unrealistic, but you can attempt to see the good in things, even if they are bad. We have five children in heaven and yes, they are some of the hardest episodes of our lives but we are trying to make good come from bad and write a book to other parents going through babyloss themselves.

So let’s return to where we started. It’s how you view yourself in life and how that impacts you and the others around you. I’m not saying I get all this right because nobody can. What I want you to think about is how you view yourself and your life. Does it keep you stuck where you are or do you need to change the sound and voice of the limiting beliefs you hold?
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