Where do you start?

So where do you start when you don’t know what to do? I have ended up talking to a number of people today because I didn’t know what to write. But you know what? There are many different things you can write about and starting anything is difficult.

I am doing an intuitive piece of artwork at the moment. One of the things I discovered this week is that I didn’t trust what I was thinking and feeling and was asking the client questions and when she answered it was exactly what I had thought originally myself.

One of the things I have realised through my work this last week is how little I have been trusting myself and what I know. As I was pondering that, I realised that so many others distrust themselves as well. Our spirit, soul, mind, gut, intuition – whatever you want to call it, I really don’t mind, but the place you hold the answers to the questions that come up.

Many of us have learnt to distrust our inner knowledge, but actually that is not a good thing. Our inner guide will always lead us right and we need to discover and learn this. It is not necessarily something we come to naturally but that’s ok. There is time, and we can all learn, no matter what age we are.

On the voyage of a journey we call life, there are many things we discover and learn. Trusting ourselves and being confident in our decisions is not easy. I know my son finds it hard to believe that what he thinks is good and right. Some days he will come and ask questions you KNOW he knows the answer to, but he tries to be reassured by an adult telling him what he thinks. What I have learned to do is ask him what he thinks and try to encourage him to believe in himself and what he thinks.

So why do some people trust themselves and what they think? HOW do they have the courage of their convictions while others falter and flounder and look around to others to provide the answers for them? Is it their personality or something that others instil inside them?

Personality has a lot to do with it, I think. Natural confidence and belief in themselves helps them to navigate the world in a seemingly easier way than most people. Although they appear to fly through life untroubled by the storms that confront other people, you really don’t know what they go through. The image they portray is not reflective of the reality inside or even outside.

What I think we all need to remember is that all the answers you need to have are within you. You can start exactly where you are. There is an untapped well of knowledge inside you that can help you in life, no matter what the occasion. Believing and trusting in yourself may not come easy but until you begin to do so, you will end up thinking you are without answers whereas they are only a thought or two away.

Having said all this, I want to say that I am not talking about anything where you need a professional to help you, but it is true for everything else.

So, the question becomes, where are you going to start now that you know you can do it?

Where do I start?

The answer lies within you
It is written in your soul
You know where the answer is
So why not stop and listen?

Anger could build up inside
When the answer seems not there
But if you could just quiet down
You’ll know what you need to do.

It’s just the quiet voice inside
The one you’re not listening to
Or it could be the feeling
The one you have discarded

But take heed of this advice
For it will guide you true
Starting is the place to be
Doing what you know to do.

Do you control it OR does it control you?

Does it control you OR do you control it?

Does it control you or do you control it. Interesting statement. I cannot take credit for the blogpost – it came from a friend of mine who has known me for over 20 years.

Instantly in my mind came a graphic picture of two elements warring against each other, both determined to win but the victory undecided. In fact, it’s the one above this post here. So we chatted about it and I was saying I was going to create it and here it is!

You see, it doesn’t refer to a particular situation or circumstance, it can apply to anything. However, if you took this and used this to make people do just as you wanted, then that would be an inappropriate usage of the power that is within that statement. Control of one human being over another is wrong, no matter WHAT the circumstances.

Pondering is quite illuminating sometimes and I started to ponder on this. How would I be if I chose this in every situation in my life? How would this then impact my family? You see, we are all linked together and could never live on an island alone, without help, without food or without clothing and without drink?

But I am talking of my immediate family. I am going to be shaking the way we live and yes, it involves a number of changes. I know it won’t be easy, but we can get through it together as a family and yes, that’s important because Johnathan is moving up in life and some things need to change now that he is coming up to school age.

But then I thought what do I need to do for myself? I have been talking about self-care but relating that to just being a mindless person watching endless tv…so far removed from what it ACTUALLY is.

Has it got to the stage of controlling me? Not quite yet and it won’t! Sometimes you just need a little push to realise who you are and what you are intended to do on this earth. Your purpose for living hasn’t expired yet – if it had, you wouldn’t be here yourself!

I’ve had some knocks in the last couple of months, but that’s ok. It doesn’t matter if you need to take time to recover from things or the shock of them. Get yourselves out there again like me and go get those goals!

I heard or read a story (I can’t remember where) that a stonemason was sitting by the side of the road hitting a rock. A child was observing each thwack of the tools as the stonemason continued his work. Finally, he said to the stonemason “which thwack of the hammer breaks the stone you are working on?” The stonemason replied that it wasn’t the first one or the last one, or all the ones in between. It was all of them TOGETHER that created the crack which split the stone.” So don’t forget the little steps that got you to where you are.

So my question to you is…..Does it control you or do you control it?

Control

Control, control who has control?
Is it me or is it you?
Life continues as it is
Or changes as it goes.

All the different things in life
Control can be unusual
You didn’t think it mattered
But you did not have control.

There are so many things in life
Where you think you have control
But do you know what happens
When it controls your mind.

Today I want what’s best for you
And give your life some freedom
What you believe will change your life
If only you will live it.

Who are you going to serve today? Part 2

Who will you serve today? Part 2.

Who will you serve today? I looked at service in work last week and now I want to look at voluntary and involuntary service. It’s not just in business that you can serve others.

Serving at home is really part of life and an attitude of gratitude, love and serving is a choice that you make every day. You can choose to serve your family or not. It is important that you choose to look after yourself before you take care of your family. You cannot pour from an empty vessel.

I want to look at voluntary and involuntary choices to help others. Yes, voluntary service starts with yourself and then your family. But where does it go next?

The attitude of love and gratitude that comes with service can also be contemplated outside the home. Living this out wherever you go will be visible to your children. It’s not always possible to live with voluntary service wherever you. There are occasions even in your household it can become hard to practice this.

Involuntary service is a little bit different. It’s something you don’t plan on doing but you almost instinctively do because it is the right thing to do.

One day recently I was out with my son and fell over on the cobblestones as they were wet getting my wheelchair into the car. I was very blessed because there was a man walking along the pavement who obviously saw what happened and came and helped me up and finished putting the wheelchair in the car for me.

I am certain this man hadn’t left home thinking he would help a disabled woman up from the ground because she had fallen over and needed help. I was deeply thankful that this man put aside anything he was planning on doing and got me up on my feet and asked if I had hit my head and needed to go to the hospital.

You can decide to be of service to people or not. It is a deliberate choice you make. I think involuntary service is a decision that may not mean that much to you, except a few seconds of your time, or a few kind words. Or it may take more but it could mean the world to the person you are blessing with your service.

So, in essence, voluntary and involuntary service is possible. You can choose to offer help or not. But if you are living a life of service, that is a choice you can make.

Who will you serve today? No 2

Who will you serve today?
Whether in or out the house
Have you prepared yourself
For the joy of giving back?

Living a life of gratitude
And having time to share
Giving back is what to do
Blessing others in your path.

So this is a choice you make
An attitude if you please
Is this the life you want to live?
Then choose to live it wisely.

Big Life Lesson

This week has been a big life lesson for me. Kevin had the flu (the real thing) and with his condition I knew there was the possibility of him getting a secondary infection and that could have produced a LOT of problems for us.

With Kevin unable to contribute to the household in any way, all the duties fell to me. I was all on my own and just as this time the Carer’s Centre told me they couldn’t come and help me at all until he had finished his medication. They had a duty of care to the workers and the other clients.

What surprised us was how he even managed to get the flu in the first place as 1. he hadn’t been out anywhere and 2. he had the flu injection last year as he always does. No matter how it looked, he was literally unable to do anything.

Not only that but there is mould in my son’s bedroom and we cannot let him sleep in there until it is sorted. So life was rather different for both of us and with Johnathan on the spectrum, he didn’t handle the changes well.

Why am I telling you all this? Well, basically, I had reached the conclusion that I couldn’t do a lot physically because of my fibromyalgia but actually I learnt this week that I am capable of SO much more than I believed.

Kevin is almost back to his normal health thank goodness and I am ok. This was a big life lesson to me and I realised that although I did things round the house and for our family, the balance of work has basically fallen onto Kevin.

I was chatting to my mentor, Linda Clay, telling her what an awful person I was and how terrible I must be. She told me that I mustn’t do that to myself and that it is a big life lesson to me. I can’t change the past or predict the future. All we have is now and what we do with what is given us.

Right now, all I have is the ability to be mindful and not let the lion’s share of the work fall on my husband. We are both disabled and used to do everything together and we have now started doing that agin. It makes such a difference when you share the load equally.

I love my wee family and will do what they need. What big life lesson have you had that made you change everything you did?